Ok ~ glad i'm back, like i found a new direction, not one direction...
finally nikky was back from his hometown, i heard that his daddy gonna do an eyes surgery on friday, and when he was back here, he's got a cough and flu, so pity ~
i heard that he was bring his friend here too, which one i don't know, and he didn't purposing at all, but his friend gonna stay here till' friday too..
hmm things we've been through?? i don't know, if there any progress, i can't see it, but maybe my "Teachers" can, so far so good i can say it, he still cares, even i did more than him, he still come to my room in the middle of the night, we are talking, hugging, laughing, cuddling, teasing, its just like in movies, when we are a doing sneak peak, but not kind that thingy, its just like a movie, more like Tom and Jerry, which is i'm the jerry and his the Tom.
i hope the progress will be good, and i have a good ending between us, and we'll be good, and happily ever after,
i feel so excited, like i got more spirits, cause my teachers said that i shouldn't give that easily, love need sacrifice, a huge sacrifice, even i feel tired, i supposed to still do that, keep fighting, and then i don't know its just so exhausting but i believe that it'll worth it, so hard to explain, but ummm, its gonna worth it,
they said i don't have to think about negative thinking that always came up to my mind, and then i always thinking bad about him,
he said that now he's testing me, the problem is in me, i'm too childish, too ever react about anything, too panic about facing problem, and maybe he's giving me a lesson, so i've to think properly, what's going on exactly about being mature, so its a big challenge for me, the truth is everyday i always thinking about being mature, how can i do this? how can i do that? or which one should i take or what have i done, its complicated, hard but its a learn for me..
I hope the time will come so i hope it'll be good, amen ~
still wish me luck <3
xoxo ZARANICK
